sometimes you get a coffee date or two, sometimes you get married, and sometimes you get this:

these were emails exchanged over the course or an hour or so tonight. Consider this another one of my public service announcements on the nature of Internet dating. (Sometimes I wonder, am I mean? Be honest)

Hey Vanessa,

Were you on eharmony?  I got it from someone's ID information.

Can you send a picture? I was on Eharmony for a few free days around New Years.

Hey Vanessa, here you go. (attaches picture of himself, he's got clean close cut hair, is apparently of Asian descent, his expression is rigid, unhappy and tense, the room he's in is rather stark)

Hey, thanks for your interest, it's been nice to hear from you, but I'm not sure I'm interested. You look pretty intense, or tense, or something... You don't look happy at all in your picture!

I do have anger issues and a very strong passive
aggressive/mysogynistic streak, so maybe that's what you're picking
up.  If your into control and manipulation though, I'm your man.

(By now, I just come right out with it and don't care if he thinks all I want is to get started making babies)
 
Aggressiveness, anger, control and manipulation don't sound like good qualities for what I'm looking for, like providing a healthy environment for children .... and I want a family, you know,  down the line.
I don't think we are very in sync with each other, but I wish you the best.

 
Something tells me that if Jesus asked you on a date, that you'd
decline saying, "but you're Jewish...."

This is silly. no hard feelings! this just isn't happening.

God bless you,

bye!

You'd be surprised.  I can be very insecure and neurotic.  I too am
half Jewish.  The family name originally was Kimstein.

Seriously, some therapy might be a good idea, or joining a 12-step group or something - they are awesome.
It's sad to keep growing in life physically but get stuck with all these insecurity issues.
 
Kimstein? That sounds made up. For real?

PS.  Say hello to your cats for me.

I mean, it's more than evident that we are not a match. don't make me fall over laughing about the ridiculousness of what you're implying. turning you down is what, like my last hope? has the sky fallen, too? not to be mean, but that's ridiculous....  This isn't going anywhere but immature and unoriginal insults are uneccessary. Seriously... like,

Vanessa,

That's not the spirit I said it in and you know it.  At least I hope
you do....right?   Regardless, I'm sorry if thats how it felt.  For
what its worth, I have cats, lots of them.  They keep me and my mom
company in the basement where I live with my parents in between Star
Trek conventions and Lord of the Ring marathons...

You know the stereotypical cat lady! So anyway, no I didn't know that, but okay. You may have a real sense of humor, which is good. Enjoy the next Star Trek convo. ;)

Live long and prosper.

Crazyblessings!

***next morning***
Thanks Vanessa.  Glad to know I haven't alienated a Messianic Jew.
You guys have pull with the top man himself.

C

PS.  For my sake, can you just tell me you're a lesbian?  =)  ...bless you.